Random Thoughts

Every once in a while you come across some new, low level celebrity fresh face that just strikes you such a way that she makes you remember why you decided to become a man in the first place. Keri Murphy, the host of Golf Channel's "Highway 18," is a perfect example. Even when she's screwing up a few simple lines of 3rd-grade reading level teleprompter material, she's adorable in the extreme. Because of Barstool's massive, universal appeal I'm no doubt introducing her to the world in a way that hosting an obscure reality show on an niche sports network never could. So I hope... and expect... that when Keri becomes an international sensation she'll know I was responsible. And I expect that she'll contact me and invite me to play a round with her.

Click here to see more of Keri...

So who's with me? Vote "10" for "Erin Andrews caliber talent" and "1" for "Eeeehh... I'm not attracted to ridiculously cute chicks."

This video isn't so much funny as it is impossible. I mean when I first watched it I just assumed that the first crash was the entire video. Boy was I wrong. How the fuck can you crash twice? I guess this just proves that you can never underestimate just how bad women drivers really are. Because to crash your golf cart twice like this is flat out impossible in my opinion. Yeah I know I just watched it happen , but it's like seeing an alien or something. My brain just can't process it.

Damn. That was one nasty ass-whipping the Celtics placed on the Pistons. And one helluva way to start a week of tough games. Toronto, Atlanta, Denver and Milwaukee (I know the Bucks suck, but this is a road game which falls under the third game in four nights scenario) are on the slate this week.

Back to the Pistons, because I want to savior their demise. This was supposed to be Allen Iverson's coming out party in Motown. A statement game proving the new look Pistons are legit. But instead, Pistons fans reigned boos down on their home team as the Celtics annihilated them. Did you see the look on Michael Curry's face? He didn't know what the hell to do. And don't give me that "all they need is some time to gel" crap. Detroit is going nowhere. Now if only someone would tell that jerk-off PA announcer Mason.

This game could have/should have been much worse because Paul Pierce and KG combined for 15 points. The bench (lead by Tony Allen) had another awesome outing. We all wondered who would replace James Posey this year. The answer to that is - everyone. Allen and Leon Powe have been great. Big Baby's been solid. Eddie House stepped it up the last two games.

Memo to Lakers fans who have infiltrated Red's Army, beating off about the Lakers 5-0 start. Nothing your team does now, can erase the pain caused by the Celtics championship. Nothing. Save the chest-thumping for May. There's been alot of buzz about Andrew Bynum, how he's the final piece of the Lakers championship puzzle. Here's a quick look at how he stacks up against Perk so far this year.

Perkins - 5.7 pts, 7.9 reb, 2.7 blks
Bynum - 9.2 pts, 8.8 reb, 2.8 blks

Chuck - Red's Army

Congratulations to the first 8 qualifiers for the Sweet 16. Like I said before this may be the toughest competition in the history of America.

Courtney

Amelia

Cynthia

Alexandra

Jenny

Felicia

Abi

Brittany

Ok as promised here is Bracket #2 for our Sexiest Halloween Costume Contest.    The voting for this round will end at noon tomorrow and then we will reseed the entire Sweet 16.    As a reminder you should be voting for some sort of combo between hottest girl and hottest costume.    Not just hottest chick or vice versa.   So it is with great pleasure I unveil the West brackets of the round of 32.

Click Here To Vote

The Herald: The Patriots are going to have to deal with yet another significant injury to a key player, as linebacker Adalius Thomas has a broken arm, according to sources... It’s not clear how long the injury will keep Thomas out of the lineup. ESPN.com reported that Thomas had a broken left forearm and was likely done for the year. Several other reports said he had a broken right arm and would be having surgery sometime this week.

Nothing is official yet. But based on how the rest of 2008 has gone for the Pats, is there anyone among us ready to assume anything less than the worst and that Thomas is done for the season? The Patriots were already the runaway choice for the uncoveted title of The NFL's Most Injured Team before Thomas went down. They've lost the league MVP, their defensive captain/spirtual leader, their top running back, their second running back, their third running back and as much as 40% of their offensive line. Since Thomas has been arguably (along with probably Ty Warren and Richard Seymour) their best defensive player this year, why would Cruel Fate not mock us by taking him off the board too?

But at the same time, saying the loss of Thomas will kill the Patriots chances is tantamount to admitting you quit watching this team the second Brady went down. Let other, lesser teams with mere mortals as coaches like Seattle, Dallas and Indy whine about injuries and use them as excuse. Bill Belichick will find a way. He'll plug Pierre Woods in at OLB, switch to the 4-3, activate Vince Redd off the practice squad and he'll contribute like his fellow undrafted rookies Gary Guyton and BenJarvus Green-Ellis. He'll re-sign a fully rested Rosie Colvin. He'll blow a conch shell which will cause Junior Seau to jump off his surfboard and report for duty. But he WILL solve this problem, I promise you.

There's a scene in "Apollo 13" when the astronauts who have had to overcome an onboard explosion, a lack of oxygen, dead fuel cells and have had to fly the spacecraft backwards, learn that there's a typhoon warning in the area where they need to land. When the meteorologist tells Ed Harris "It could miss them," he says "Only if their luck changes." But he also says that not only is the mission not a failure, on the contrary it's been NASA's finest hour. With the Patriots luck apparently not about to change, with the injury "bug" developing into a full blown epidemic and them still in first place in a position to put some distance between them and the rest of the division in the next two weeks, we're witnessing Belichick's finest hour.

PRYOR, OK -- It's not everyday a dog not only rides in a car but takes the wheel. Spot Free Car Wash employee, Mark Walker, says he saw it all happen. "I heard someone holler and I had seen a car come off the four lane and backwards into this car wash. As soon as I looked around the corner I saw the dog in the car, just the dog." Walker was just as surprised as the dog must have been when he was left alone in the car and Killys bumped the gearshift into reverse. "He went for a ride," says Sgt. Brent Crittenden. Killys then backed the car out of the car wash and onto US Highway69. "When it hit the curb it turned the wheels allowing the car to a big circle along Highway 69." When Sgt. Crittenden arrived on scene he what police are trained to do with any driver. "I checked the dog for a license and it did have current city dog license and it wasn't apprehended," says Crittenden. Sgt. Crittenden says in his 26 years on the police force he's never seen anything like it.

Well obviously this took place on Highway 69 in Oklahoma, it had to. And sure, you can give Killys the Dog all the credit in the world here for driving better in reverse than most old ladies do forward, but what about the cop?  Kudos to Sgt. Crittenden for following the strict letter of the law here and promptly checking Killys for his license.  A lot of cops wouldn't do that. Frankly I didn’t even know dogs knew how to drive, let alone had a license.  Hey, that’s why he’s out there protecting and serving the streets of America while I’m just here blogging at my desk.

Click here for the answer

As a general rule, I think when you wear the punter's shirt to the game you are pretty much admitting defeat going in. But I guess rooting for the punter is better than being frustrated every time you go 3 and out and lose to Pats for the millionth straight time. I mean at least this guy could walk out of Gillette and be proud that Brian Moorman had another big game. But something tells me he still didn't have as much fun as Big Daddy Smooth did yesterday.

- Thanks to the guy who send this from the game

Things to consider while wondering if BenJarvus Green Ellis qualifies as a running back tandem:

*After the Blue Windbreaker Fiasco in Indy, I get physically nervous now at the start of the telecast that Belichick will be wearing something other than a gray sweatshirt. It's the same feeling as when I'm going be with my wife's family and I start dreading that my mother-in-law might be showing cleavage again.

*If you had "3rd minute of the 2nd quarter" in your "At What Point Will a Buffalo DB Knock the Ball Out of Ben Watson's Hands?" Pool, come to the courtesy desk to claim your prize.

*There's one thing seriously don't get. Why would anyone go the Gilletteside Krafteria Mall on game day? Maybe CBS Scene is the greatest sports bar on Earth, but wouldn't that mean you're paying $45 to park just so you can eat burgers and wings?

*I don't ask much of the announcing team, honestly. But is too much to ask that they stay on top of the injuries as they happen? Pierre Woods went in for Adalius Thomas sometime in the late 1st quarter, and not a mention was made of it until the middle of the 3rd. That would be the same Adalius Thomas who's been the best player on the Patriots defense for long stretches of the season and it doesn't merit a mention. Meanwhile they can't stop talking about Tom Brady's 7 minute season.

*Taking away nothing from proven NFL tough guys, but you get an ice cold bucket of Industrial Strength Perspective dumped over your head when you see all those active military people standing on the sideline. There's not a man or woman among them that couldn't kill the toughest guy in football with a facial expression.

*That said, would it have killed someone to fetch them some folding chairs?

*I'd like to see the Patriots someday erect a statue of Brady like the one BC put up of Doug Flutie. They could also do one of Drew Bledsoe, but it would more mobile in the pocket than Drew was.

To read this half-assed effort in its entirety, click here...

Wow what a weekend for Boston Sports huh?    The Patriots, Celtics and Bruins were a combined 4-0 with 4 blowout victories.  And even BC chipped in with their obligatory wood shed beating of Notre Dame.  It’s almost like if you play sports in Boston or write a sports blog in Boston you have no choice, but to be awesome.   I mean we’re just dominating shit everywhere and it all starts with the Pats.   Every fucking week this team is getting better by leaps and bounds.   Every week Matt Cassel looks more like Jeff Hostetler. Seriously at the rate this team is improving we’re going to be scary good by the time the playoffs roll around.   Will it be good enough to beat the Giants in the Superbowl?    Who knows?   But I am 100% convinced that we are on a collision course for a rematch and unlike last year we’ll be peaking at the right time instead of vice versa.   (Looks like those Revenge shirts were a great idea after all)   To be honest I almost feel bad for all the haters out there.  I mean this was supposed to be the year they finally got their revenge on Belichick and Co. for mashing their faces into the mud for the past decade.   They started chirping the second Brady got injured and only got louder when we lost to Miami and SD.  They ranted and raved about how Belichick couldn’t win without Brady.    They said Randy Moss would pack it in.  They said our defense was too old and our secondary too depleted.    But here we are at 6-3 and getting better every week.  I’m dead serious when I say I’d pick us vs. every team in the league right now except the Giants.    It’s just another example of why the Patriots are the perfect franchise and anybody who was dumb enough to write us off doesn’t deserve to cover football for a living.   Because as long as Bill Belichick is roaming the sidelines in New England the Patriots will always be the team to beat.  So do me a favor and cue the Duck Boats because even if the Pats don’t win the Superbowl, the Celts or Bruins probably will win a championship anyway.   Bottom line is that with so many great teams floating around in Boston, a parade is always only a heartbeat away.

Click for more of Elisabetta Gregoraci

Send wake up nominations to randomthoughts@barstoolsports.com